Mixed Feelings...

Have you ever had mixed feelings when you wanted to leave an existing company to start on a fresh job?

Well, I certainly do. Just last Friday, I was battling internally to walk up to my CEO's office with the intention of notifying him of my decision to resign. The anxiety almost ate me up as I had been waiting the entire morning till late afternoon to be able to catch a small time slot to talk to him about my intentions.

Anyway, the time came and my heart was pulsating so fast that I almost fainted while walking towards the CEO’s office. But, I thank God for the tranquility and serenity that flows over and enveloped me as I stepped into his room. Estimating the worse to happen (even prepared if I am going to be escorted out within 24 hours), I was more than prepared to face whatsoever consequences were to come next.

After spending about 30 minutes of uncovered discussions and opinions, the certainty of my decision to move on gradually became clearer. And whatever was said and mentioned in the room by my CEO confirms that my decision was right and it will be a wise move. Now, is the grueling waiting period for acceptance of my resignation. The CEO made his mind clear to me that he will not hold me back from my decision to move on, yet (right… there is still a “yet”), which made my heart skipped a beat, he did not want to take my written resignation and was telling me verbally that he is not accepting the fact that I wanted to resign, and wanted to talk to me further on this again topic *big SIGH*

Till today, he has been avoiding to see me and has now travelled overseas for some business trips. What will the outcome be for my next step? It is still uncertain. Though I am very adamant in moving on as I have accepted the offer from the my future employer, but the CEO is trying to buy time in making me to rethink over my decision again.

I am still pondering on what will he do next to me…